Me: "I need a helper" [looking at Darius]
My Mother-in-Law: "Helper is so sexist. Why do they call it a help-her? Like only women need help."
Me: "It isn't spelled H-E-L-P-H-E-R. It isn't even pronounced that way."
Darius: "But I don't want to be girl."
MIL: "It sounds like help-her to me. Where are the help-hims?"
Darius: "I am not a help-her. I am a help-boy."
Me: "Help-hers. Helper. Help-him. Help-boy. I don't care who helps. Just HELP already."
