I watched (and cringed) when Carrie Prejean, Miss California, answered in the Miss USA Pageant that she believes gay marriage is wrong. Did I think that her beliefs should disqualify her for the title? Not really. Beauty pageants are like a conservative version of soft porn. Beautiful women prancing around a stage wearing a pound of make-up and little else. Does it matter if her views are in sharp contrast to my own? Absolutely not. It's not like she's a world leader. She'll be on the arm of Donald Trump for a year. Hardly a face of America. Does anyone really listen to Miss USA anyways? I thought the main job requirements were to look good in a bikini and the ability to smile for hours on end.
What bothers me more is the firestorm about Carrie Prejean's response (just read some of those comments and you'll probably want to throw up). I have always believed that gay marriage should be legalized. I do not think that religious institutions should have to honor or perform same-sex marriages. I do think that the federal government and state governments should have to recognize same-sex marriage and give same-sex couples the same rights under the law. It's a civil rights issue. Cut and dry. Everyone in this country should have equal rights under the law.
When Prop 8 passed in California, I was deeply saddened. I have friends and even family members that are gay. It breaks my heart that so many people in California and across the country believe they should be second class citizens. I simply don't understand how people could vote for their sons and daughters, their sisters and brothers, their nieces and nephews to have less rights.
And for those of you who hold steadfast to your Christian beliefs that hating homosexuals is acceptable because they are "sinners," MY Christian faith teaches me that Jesus loves ALL of us sinners. "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone. - John 8:7 " Even if you believe that homosexuality is a sin, you must acknowledge that Jesus loved lepers, prostitutes, tax-collectors and a whole lot of other sinners - including YOU. There is a very clear message in the New Testament that faith alone grants access to eternal life. So please, enough of using "Christian faith" as an excuse for bigotry. Jesus was no bigot.
My gay best friend Christian asked me once when I was still pregnant with Darius how I would react if Darius was gay. I told him that gayness could never change the love I feel for my child. It would be a non-issue.
But that isn't entirely true. I would be sad for him. Sad because living his authentic life would be so much harder to do in a country that has murdered, in hate, so many people in the LGBT community. Sad because he wouldn't have the same rights if he fell in love or wanted to have children. Sad because his obstacles wouldn't just be about acceptance but about giving up freedoms. I would never love him any less. But my golly george, I would hurt for him knowing that he was facing a world of hurt, hate, and intolerance.
Up until 1967, many states in our country didn't allow a white to marry a non-white. It took a US Supreme Court ruling to say that laws prohibiting interracial marriage were unconstitutional. We must work tirelessly to create a culture which embraces differences in gender and sexual orientation, just as we have fought racism and sexism.
The rights of partnership like health care privileges, child custody, etc. should be no different for same-sex couples. Miss California could've said that she supports equal rights but is against gay marriage and, who knows, maybe she'd be wearing the Miss USA crown and we'd be having a whole different discussion right now.
Then again, it is a bit much to expect an intelligent answer from a beauty pageant contestant.
