Who's The Boss?

And he never looked back

 

The alarm went off at 6:30 this morning. As soon as Darius heard me turn on the shower, he bolted out of bed and ran to me.

"Is it FINALLY my first day of school?!?!"

It's a man's world

Some of you may watch Track and Field with a real passion.  Most of you are probably like me... you watch every four years during the Olympics.  I'm always amazed at the sheer number of events.  You've got the mammoths competing in strength events like shot-put.  There's the tall and slender athletes who've perfected the jumps.  And then there's the flashy sprinters who can run faster than what seems humanly possible.

Track and Field is as scandalous as baseball.  There's always someone getting stripped of medals because of steroids, or as we now delicately call it "performance enhancing drugs." I guess the competition is so fierce to be the World's Fastest Man or Woman that a few of these world-class athletes would do anything to get (and stay) at the top.

But what happens when the world isn't questioning if you've taken drugs but rather if you are a man parading as a woman to win?  That's exactly what has happened to Caster Semenya after she creamed her competition by over 2 seconds.  Before she can claim true ownership of the medal she already won, Semenya is required to complete a "gender verification test."

We have a reader!

Yes, that's my baby reading a book on his own. I picked up a collection of Bob Books at the store on Friday. Darius read the first three books without any help (a total confidence builder).  Amazing! I'm feeling almost as proud as the day when I no longer had to wipe his butt.  Almost. 

He's a cold-hearted snake

Mom, am I cold-hearted?

Huh?

Like snakes.  Snakes are cold-hearted, right?

Oh... you mean cold-blooded.  No, you aren't cold-blooded.

Why are snakes cold-blooded?

Because they can't self-regulate their body temperature.

Huh?

When you go into the shade, do you get freezing cold?  Or if you go into the sun, do you get super hot?

[laughs] No.

That's because your body works to keep you warm or helps you cool off when you are hot.

[laughs] It's good that I'm not cold-hearted.

[kisses his head] Yes, it's really good you aren't cold-hearted.

Invisalign Mom Blogger Straight Talk

 

Our family dentist has already told us to get ready for braces.  Dr Shah showed the X-Rays in Darius’ last office visit and I saw it for myself.  Darius’ permanent teeth are gonna come in crooked.  Add to that his adorably adorable baby-tooth smile isn’t gap-y enough to handle adult teeth.  And yes, for the record, “gap-y” is totally a real technical dental word.  I know because in the seventh grade I said I wanted to be a dentist, so I’m an expert.*

Lucky for us, we have a few years before we have to find a great orthodontist, make any decisions on treatment or pay through the nose for our son to have a great, straight smile.  I mean, the kid hasn’t even lost his first tooth yet.  But as I cry a little watching my baby go off to Kindergarten, I know that these next few years will fly by and before I know it, I’ll be asking for a payment plan for my son’s braces.

It's a bird... It's a plane...

 

It's a corn-husk Super hero.  It's also been a gun, Obi Wan Kenobi, and Batman.

Thanks to the volunteer at the Children's Discovery Museum who helped my son make a really special cornhusk doll after his mother effed it up by making a cornhusk girl.

One Working Mom's take on the Healthcare Bill

It's true... I love my job... and my employer paid benefits.  That perk of being gainfully employed and having access to high-quality healthcare is probably the #1 reason that I will always continue to work.  Earlier this year, I considered going part-time when my son starts kindergarten next week.  I did all my research about how many hours I could reduce before my healthcare benefits at work would change. I wasn't about to give up those valuable bennies.

I'm know I'm one of the lucky ones.  Not only do I have health insurance for me and my family, the company I work for subsidizes that insurance so that it is affordable to me.  My premium and co-pays are low.  I've never had to decide between paying for health insurance or paying the rent.  I've never been denied insurance based on a pre-existing condition clause or have to appeal when my claim has been denied.

But do you really think that the government can fix all that?  Do you really think all the problems are going to be solved with this bill?  Because if you do, I'd like a hit from the crack pipe you're smoking.

Yes, our country needs to make sure that everyone has access to insurance.  Yes, people shouldn't be denied from insurance or made to pay through the nose for it.  Yes, caps on maximums need to be raised or remove all together.  Yes, we need affordable, accessible, non-bureaucratic insurance. 

But I do not believe that this all gets solved by our government taking over our whole healthcare system? Can you name one department the government runs well?  Education? FAIL.  Medicare? FAIL.  Social Security? FAIL.   

Instead of having the government take over healthcare, it should be finding a way to work with what we already have to make ensure that everyone has affordable access.  Because really? Do we another huge government social program? I don't think so.

Original post for the Silicon Valley Mom's Blog

Yes, our country needs to make sure that everyone has access to insurance.  Yes, people shouldn't be denied from insurance or made to pay through the nose for it.  Yes, caps on maximums need to be raised or remove all together.  Yes, we need affordable, accessible, non-bureaucratic insurance. 

But I do not believe that this all gets solved by our government taking over our whole healthcare system? Can you name one department the government runs well?  Education? FAIL.  Medicare? FAIL.  Social Security? FAIL.   

Instead of having the government take over healthcare, it should be finding a way to work with what we already have to make ensure that everyone has affordable access.  Because really? Do we another huge government social program? I don't think so.

Original post for the Silicon Valley Mom's Blog

Things I say at least 1,000 times in a day

• How can you be bored? You have a room full of toys!

• I'm not responsible for your things.  If you lost it, then you find it.

• No means no.

• Seriously kid, I said no.

• For goodness sakes, please stop asking me after I said NO!

• Time to clean-up!

• Shh... Mommy is on a call.

• No, you can't watch TV.

• No, you can't play the Wii either.

• Go play.

• It's time to go.

• Put your shoes on.

• Where are your shoes?

• Why aren't your shoes on?

 How about you?

HELP! We canceled the Cable!

  The conversation started months ago.  Maybe even years.  My cost-cutting spouse wanted to cut the cable.  I told him he was crazy! Abso-friggin-lutely crazy!  Television was my escape from the daily grind.  If I had a bad day at work, there was always the comfort of a classic movie on OnDemand brighten my mood.  If I was feeling bad about myself, there was always some jackass on insert-the-name-here Reality Show that proved I was smarter than that guy.  If I needed a break or wanted to cook dinner without interruption, there was always some educational programming that could buy me at least 20 minutes. 

Cable was my security blanket.  An expensive security blanket, but one that I was not willing to give up. 

Or so I thought.

When the economy started to show signs of collapse, my spouse convinced me to reduce our costs.  Digital cable was converted to basic cable.  It cost just $15 a month to have about 40 channels.  Sure, a third of them were in Spanish or some version of QVC, but surely he couldn't argue with just fifteen dollars a month.  Even Mr. Cheapskate could appreciate that, right? 

Well, when the digital conversion finally took place in June, we lost another third of our channels to digital cable.  We were down to just the local channels plus a few extras.  I was upset about paying more for less.  But at the price we were paying, it didn't seem like enough to change or cancel it.  Even knowing that we get very little more than what a pair of bunny ears and digital converter box would supply. 

After weeks of having to hear about how we aren't getting the value from the price we are paying, I finally did it.  I agreed and canceled the cable.  No more America Idol.  No more Big Brother.  No more Desperate Housewives.  No more Lifetime movies.  We are going to the end of the year before we go the bunny-ear route.  Living without TV for a while would be good for us all.

At least I still have the internet.  There's no way we're cutting out that.

Original post for the Silicon Valley Mom's Party

Well, when the digital conversion finally took place in June, we lost another third of our channels to digital cable.  We were down to just the local channels plus a few extras.  I was upset about paying more for less.  But at the price we were paying, it didn't seem like enough to change or cancel it.  Even knowing that we get very little more than what a pair of bunny ears and digital converter box would supply. 

After weeks of having to hear about how we aren't getting the value from the price we are paying, I finally did it.  I agreed and canceled the cable.  No more America Idol.  No more Big Brother.  No more Desperate Housewives.  No more Lifetime movies.  We are going to the end of the year before we go the bunny-ear route.  Living without TV for a while would be good for us all.

At least I still have the internet.  There's no way we're cutting out that.

Original post for the Silicon Valley Mom's Party

There is no better smell than CLEAN

The house is tidy.

Every thing is put in its place.

The beds are made.

The sheets are in for washing.

The furniture is polished.

The floors are mopped.

The bathrooms sparkle.

I love Wednesdays. 

The housekeeper is here and I'm in 7th Heaven.

The WAT-AAH Summer Challenge

Darius is a juice junkie.  Whenever you ask him what he wants to drink, he'll always respond with juice.  Or lemonade.  Or juice-box.  Or something along those lines.  We don't keep much juice in the house.  When Darius was in preschool, I knew that the school served apple juice at snack times.  Sure, they watered it down just like we do at home.  But knowing that Darius could have as much juice as he wanted twice a day was enough to practically ban it from our house. 

When the kiddo graduated from preschool this June, he started to go through juice with-drawls.  Tack on a trip to Arkansas where he had his fair share of juice and what felt like gallons of Sweet Tea, we had an official juice addict on our hands. 

Working Moms Pop Quiz

When a PR person reaches out to you with an offer for a free hotel night stay in San Francisco in exchange for attending a seminar on a topic you are interested in (and of course, blog about it), do you...

a) arrange for a babysitter to take your child for the night so that you can have a romantic night away with man that helped create that darling boy?

b) book tickets to see Wicked and tell your mom to come for a Mother-Daughter bonding weekend?

c) schlep the whole family up.  Dad will entertain your kiddo during the seminar at the hotel pool and the next day y'all will spend the day at the Exploratorium?

d) go alone, call your gay best friend for a raucous night in San Francisco, stay out all night and sleep until the maid service literally kicks you out of your room?

Friday Link Love

Remember that fabulous giveaway not too long ago for the Tree of Life.  Well the great folks over at Black Mountain Jewelry are having an End of Summer sale.  If you know a mom, have a mom, are a mom, or are going to be one... seriously check out their stuff and buy some Christmas presents now. 

Donors Choose (one of my favorite charities) has partnered with the Gates Foundation to equally match your donations.  Check out these classroom projects that the Foundation will fund 50% - as long you fund the rest. 

Not on Twitter yet?  Here's a reason to join.  Land's End is hosting a Twitter Party on August 20th from 7-9pm CST (#landsend).  There will be 20 fab prizes plus folks willing to help you with all your Back to School questions. 

Yummie Tummie has a new fall fashions.  I know, they cost an arm and a leg.  But they work and are a thousand times cuter than wearing Spanx. I myself nearly peed my pants in excitement when I saw the new Strappy by Cup Size.

**Because people are all up in arms about product placement in blogging, I want to be very clear that I didn't receive a penny or a product for linking to the companies above.  They just happen to be companies I love and feel should get a little linky love.  If they want to send me truck loads of their product, however, you can bet your ass I'll be forwarding my mailing address immediately.

freedom

It's official!  I'm no longer wiping any butts (other than my own, thank you very much).

Five long years of ass wiping.  And it's over.  Can I hear a "Hallelujah" or a "Mazel Tov" or something equally fantastic like "It's about fucking time"?

Teaching the art of wiping took just as long, if not longer, than teaching the art of aiming into the toilet.  There were tears (mine), tantrums (also mine), and flat out refusals to wipe (again, mainly me). 

I was afraid that Darius was developing early signs of OCD.  I could see his future on the Obsessed show where most of the people have some frighteningly messed up fear over poop. The kid just wouldn't wipe his butt. 

heels

While I've only been working from home in an official capacity for a few months (in an unofficial capacity for nearly a year), I've felt a clear change in my life.  I've gotten out of the working-from-home-in-your-pajamas thing.  Thanks to having to take Darius to swim practice on a daily basis, then do drop-offs & pick-ups for summer camp, and knowing that I'll be doing the same when he starts Kindergarten this month, I've been forced to learn how to get dressed in the chaotic morning routine.  Having the short hair helps.  Bed head is a serious motivator to, you know, actually not look like I've just rolled out of bed at 2pm when I've really been up since 6am. But there is one part of my wardrobe that has slacked off completely. 

My shoes. It would probably be better to describe it as my lack of shoes.

I'm barefoot at home.  I lead professional calls with dirty feet that have gone outside to line-dry the laundry, or water the garden, or get the mail.  When it's time to pick up Darius, I throw on the first pair of flip flops I see (believe me, I own WAY too many flip flops for a professional working woman) and I'm on my way.