When I returned from my maternity, my darling Darius wasn't even 12 weeks old yet. He was teeny tiny. And I was a very bust-y nursing mom. Armed with my super duper Medela breastpump (a gift from my mother), I was so thankful that my employer had just created super duper "Nursing Rooms" for the working mommas. It was a good thing too. There were five other women who used that room with me. We all felt like we were doing the right thing. We bonded over our babies while we each discreetly pumped behind designer curtains while sitting on comfy chairs. It was a working mother's dream.
So why did I quit pumping four months later?
Because pumping at work is hard, y'all. Really really hard.
When Darius hit a growth spurt at 7 months, he literally wanted to be feed every hour during the night (mind you, I was working during the day so there was no "just sleep when the baby sleeps" anymore). After a few days of being totally exhausted, my milk supply was going down, not increasing. So one night, I asked Neville to grab a bottle of formula. I had kept formula in the house for a few months, realizing that if I got hit by a bus or had to take a business trip that there was not enough milk in our freezer to last more than a day (and that had to go to the daycare lady). Neville made a bottle, Darius took it like a champ, and then Darius refused to ever nurse again.
I wasn't expecting that to happen. While a part of me was sad that Darius no longer wanted to nurse, a bigger part of me was so thrilled that I didn't have to pump at work anymore. No more lugging around a big bag. No more hiding breastmilk in the break-room fridge. No more having to label and date everything. No more having to clean those pump parts that make you feel more like a dairy cow than a mother. No more having to find time to pump in a day that was often filled with back to back meetings.
I nursed for 7 months. And I was perfectly happy with making it that far. I pumped at work for four months. And I still contend that I deserve a medal for making it that long.
And that was at a company that was compassionate and flexible towards working moms. With a boss who didn't freak out if I ran into his office at 3:30pm clutching my breasts saying "I'm gonna be late to our meeting, if I don't pump now I'm gonna explode!" And working in the high-tech industry where no one watched when you come and go or mandates when to go to lunch or take breaks.
Clearly, I didn't know how lucky I was to be working at a company like that.
Ohio Supreme Court just sided with Isotoner in their firing of a breastfeeding mother who took "unauthorized" breaks to pump. The Justices said that it basically didn't matter why she took the unauthorized break because by taking the break without management approval was grounds for firing.
And I'll say that a part of me agrees with Isotoner and the Ohio Supreme Court. If you break the rules, then you should expected to get canned.
But...
And it's a big BUT
Where's the compassion? Where's the flexibility? Isotoner, you made a big FAIL. The manager should have made an exception. The woman was asking for her break to be moved to a more suitable time so that she could pump. Isotoner, the line level manager, the HR department and who ever else thought that it was OK to fire a woman for taking a break at a different time to be able to pump... you people are a big bunch of idiots.
Do you know what would have happened had you decided the other way? You would have ended up with one loyal and highly productive working momma. She would have been thrilled that you accommodated and SUPPORTED her. And while other workers may have baulked at the situation, I'm sure your HR department could have easily explained that the mother was not getting extra time off or had less responsibilities. That she was simply being allowed a schedule change to accommodate a special circumstance and that things would go back to "normal" in a few months. It's not like she would need to pump during the day for many more months. I'm sure her fellow employees would have understood that this was only TEMPORARY.
But No, instead Isotoner was a complete a-hole and FIRED the lady.
The bigger problem is that although this seems to be an issue of gender discrimination, it really relates to the larger problem of work-life balance, which is totally unrelated to gender. At some point in adult working lives, most of us will have personal challenges that may require us to alter our work shifts, take extra breaks, work from home, etc. This is true for both men and women. Married or single. Childless or breeders. When companies recognize that we need work-life balance and accommodate those needs, the company will have a stronger, more productive, loyal workforce.
I'm not trying to demonize Isotoner or glorify LaNisa as a champion of breast feeding. Clearly the law was on their side. Clearly the statute prohibiting discrimination against a woman for a pregnancy-related issue needs to be re-written to include lactation as a pregnancy-related issue. And clearly, Isotoner could have stepped up and been the hero.
